Ramblings of the Unimportant

I have decided to live on purpose! I know this seems like a concept that was taught yesterday....but I admit I skipped a lot of classes in high school. I was listening to the radio this morning and realized that I too am just going through the motions and life is totally passing me by! I know that God created me for something MUCH greater and who am I to decide not to use my gifts for the greater good. I'm no one that's who! {I feel that it's only necessary to also admit that I am a serial exclamation point and smiley face user-I'll have to work on that too} I have been feeling like a member of the 'left behind' group for some time now, but I suppose I am finally ready to commit to changing. My first step in removing my mask is to openly admit the things that I hide from everyone, and by everyone I AM including myself. Self deception is a mask of the worst kind! If I don't admit who I truly am then how am I going to expect others to accept me?  Here go...

       WOW! Is all I can start with!! What a remarkable month October has turned out to be. I knew it would be a lot to swallow but in the end November has to be better, right? Let's see...where to begin??? I celebrated the 3yr anniversary of my father's death. I say celebrating only after 3yrs because it is a celebration of his entrance into heaven and out of physical pain! Amen! I miss him everyday, but am thankful for all of the wonderful memories I have to cherish.        My younger brother, whom I've been estranged for the last two years was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor. CRaZy!! I felt like I was stepping right into all the episodes of Twilight Zone that I watched as a kid! He is only 30yrs old and is a single parent of my three little nieces. Of course I was overwhelmed with guilt the minute I discovered his fate. You see I haven't spoken to him for TWO years. We have never seen eye to eye and with...

This is the time of year that everything slows down for me. My father and I have been birthday buddies since I was born. Every year we looked forward to September. We are the only members of our family that didn't have Spring birthdays~I can remember always feeling so special that it was just the two of us. My birthday is on the 20th and his exactly one week later on the 27th.  Usually, we would share a big chocolate cake and tease the one whose birthday ended up being on a weekday. In about eleven days it will be 3 years since my father lost his battle with Cancer. I shouldn't really call it a battle! He was diagnosed in August and he died in October~ that's hardly enough time to put up much of a fight!! He never even made it to his first Chemo treatment. It has been a long and hard three years. Not only losing my birthday buddy, but losing my protector.....my strength....my comforter....my Superman....my Daddy.  I know that I am so blessed to have had him in m...

Well, as you may have noticed I haven't been blogging lately. Since my last post, life has just went into warp speed and I'm doing good just to keep up. We have started Fall and everything that goes with it full speed ahead!! ~ Middle School (yikes!), 5th Grade, Girl Scouts, Cub Scouts, Flag Football, Band & throw in there a SUPER cool Wednesday evening program at church and serving in the church nursery on Sunday mornings (I love widdle babies!!) ~~ Every evening is jammed packed with scheduled activities, sleep deprivation and FUN! We are busy but are having a blast! We have even gotten the chance to sneak away and have some good ole' fun at the park & the lake (even though it's getting pretty chilly out there). My mother has been up here with us for a little bit and we have enjoyed some yummy southern cookin! I told her that she has to quit fryin everything because it is not good for any of us~ To which she replied, "I don't know how to cook any othe...

Life is busy. Everything is so fast paced and there is not enough time in one day to accomplish it all.  I have found in the last several weeks that I have been so caught up on making it through this phase of my journey that I have forgotten to make time for the important stuff. I saw a discussion topic the other day about naming what you need and what others could do for you that would help meet that need. This really got my mind moving! I think my need right now is people. I think I just woke up one day & realized that I don't have any friends that share the same beliefs as me. I know that you probably think this shouldn't be an issue, but it really is. When I say that I want to be able to tell someone everything I mean everything without a filter and without the fear of rejection and/or judgement.  Does that kind of friend really exist outside of biological sisterhood?

 This weekend we celebrated Topher's 11th bday bash at the lake. The kids had a blast!! Two of Topher's friends were able to join us, Ty & Anand. The boys spent most of their time jumping around of the water trampoline, fishing and doing top secret boy stuff in his new tent.  That is, until little Miss Olivia crashed their party. It was so funny! Onna was the only one to catch a fish (which I'm sure she will remind the boys daily!) & Eli enjoyed the birthday cake a little too much =)  Everyone was so worn out by Sunday night from all of the water play that we packed up and went home~coincidently right before the big storm rolled in~ Thank you to everyone that helped make this birthday bash the best beginning of our summer ever!  Happy Birthday to my bouncing baby boy I love you ( I know, I know he's not a baby anymore).               ...

Man, has this been a tough year! I am still in disbelief that Onna is on her way to 6th grade next year. I must admit the thought of the kids being separated next year tugs at my heart. ~ I understand that this is a ridiculous feeling since they can't wait to be independent of one another.  Is it wrong that I want them to stay like the peas & carrots they were when they were little? Onna, you have been a blessing to me for twelve wonderful years and I am so proud of the young lady you have become. Congratulations on your completion of Elementary School. I can't wait to see what God has in store for you at middle school!! 

What a weekend! One of my good friends had surgery last week ~ so we have been camped out at her house all weekend helping out. Christopher managed to sneak away to a friends house and Onna and I were able to squeeze in a trip to the video store to stock up on some goodies to watch. I have been running around like a chicken with it's head cut off for the past few weeks~ so being grounded to my friends house didn't bother me too badly. Tonight we resume regular activities. Today= kids school, work, Christopher's baseball game, Onna's softball game, shower & bed (by 10pm if we're lucky). oh yea, and I guess we need to fit meals in there somewhere. Man, if only kids required food & water every two-three days like my plants!

     We had such a great weekend! Both the kids had ball games on Saturday, so we spent all day at the ball park. Onna's team played a double-header. They lost one game and won the other~ Not bad considering it was their first loss of the season. Christopher's team celebrated their first win!! It was so amazing, and I personally believe it was because of Mother's Day (hee~hee). Later that evening Christopher and I had a mother-son date at the movies, and Onna and I started planting some flowers after church on Sunday. It was so much fun spending some good family time with them. We have been so busy lately that we haven't had the chance to enjoy each other.  Here are a few of my favorite pictures.

So much has happened in my life in the last six months that I can hardly keep up! GOD is so amazing. I know what you're thinking~and yes I realize this isn't a new revelation. I admit that I have been blind. I have allowed the world to control my life & I have allowed others to control my happiness. I am here to say that after 31 years of life I KNOW that I am special & GOD has a plan for me. I have finally opened my ears to the quiet whisper of the Lord...and WOW was it wonderful! Thank you so much Father for sacrificing your one and only so that I could have life. ~ I recently attended the Beth Moore life changing event (as I like to call it). It was on her new book, So Long Insecurity. I knew I was insecure, but oh my goodness! Sitting there...actually listening to the characteristics of a secure woman (directly from the bible) highlighted exactly how insecure I really was. ** I write today because I have been set free from my low self esteem & all my insecuritie...

     I just got back from an amazing trip with my good friend Jenny~ First to Alabama then to New Orleans. I am so grateful that we had the opportunity to stop at my brother's house on the way to visit for a couple of hours (wish my niece Maddie would have been there). My brother & sister-in-law were as funny as ever. I don't get to see them very often at all so the time was much needed! My niece~ the wonderful Tails~ was being her normal silly, loveable self & Maddie was missing in action. Man, I miss those girls! Now on to New Orleans~~      Bourbon Street was the typical "strip" that you can locate in every town. Bourbon street was a smaller scale Vegas and a bigger 6th street from my childhood. The smell was unique, and the art galleries that smelled like horse stalls was an unexpected twist to my walk in the French Quarter. I know it seems like this is going to be filled but nothing but negatives, but it's not. The buildings were ab...

Kids say the craziest things sometimes! When we were in elementary school there was that one group of boys that insisted on being gross at all costs. You know the ones I'm talking about. They were always in the back of the line~or the back of the bus making those awful sounds with their hands under their armpits. Well, I bring this up because I was informed yesterday that the arm'farts' are still alive and well in our schools today. My sons looks up at me and says~ "Boys in my class can make that noise with their armpits...I can't do it, and I'm sooo jealous of them." There you have it folks...I guess your kid is either the one making the noises or the one jealous of the boys that can!

I have so much to say and so little time.... 2010 is going to be a year of changes for our family so in an attempt to keep all my family and friends up to speed I am starting this blog. I have been keeping a journal since I was in elementary school, but am very intimidated for others to read the randomness that actually goes on in my head. The cheese may stand alone ~but~ I prefer old fashioned pen & paper. Hope you enjoy and maybe even get a couple of laughs like I do!